28th December

He decided He needs to start hitting me everyday again since it’s obvious I’m not getting into the spirit of things as befitting a new mother to be. He thinks I miss the daily smacks, and that’s why I’m not in the proper frame of mind. Like a few smacks are going to make me happy about anything. He should settle for being pleased that I’ve finally accepted the death that is my life, that I’m never going to get out of here. That I’m never going to see my family or friends again. That I’m never going to see colour again or taste real food. Or be clean. Why can’t He accept that and just let me die. I have nothing to live for, my life ended the day He came into it. And I’ve just been existing since then, no where, nothing, no one, just this death.