Chapter 4 - November 1998 -12th November

I was right, God help me. PLEASE! Please help me, I don’t want this, I don’t want it, kill it please. Please God, kill it. I can’t have His child. His baby monster. Take it out of me. I know Grandma S would say it’s a sin to want to kill it, and that I should get down on my knees and thank God for such a gift. But God had nothing to do with this. This is EVIL, pure and simple EVIL. And if there really is a God out there do you think I would be here now, like this. I sure as shit don’t! I only hope He doesn’t notice cause I don’t know what He’ll do, and that scares me just about more than death.