15th November

I couldn’t do it. I was too scared. I’m afraid to die. Last night when He came in to use me, I apologised and showed Him where I had eaten the gruel off the floor. He patted me on the head like a dog and told me what a good girl I was. He said He would reward me as I deserved for being His good girl. His rewards are as bad as His Punishments. I’m so dirty now I’ll never be clean again.